Tag Archives: teens

The One thing All Players Need from Their Coach and Parents

Without adults, there would be no organized youth sports. But adults can ruin it for the kids. In this guest post, writer Quinn McDowell gives us adults some good advice. Managing the Complexity The dynamics between players, coaches, and parents … Continue reading

Bonding with Teens – The Secret Sauce Is How You Talk to Them

Teens are different from younger kids in lots of ways. They may not be adults yet, but they aren’t little kids anymore. If you talk to them as if they are, you’ll push them away. They need your guidance, but … Continue reading

“Your Teen” Online Magazine – A Great Resource for Parents

I’ve discovered Your Teen, a weekly online magazine that’s a great resource for parents of teens. The current issue has these articles… “Why a Working Gap Year Is Worth Considering for Your Teen,” by Tim Elmore. “Move-Out Skills 101: Making Lunch” … Continue reading

A Powerful Parenting Skill – Get Kids to Think for Themselves

My wife, Kathleen Scott,  contributes regularly to the San Antonio Express-News Travel section and sometimes to the Food section. She also is working on a third draft of a mystery novel. I think it’s remarkable that she made a successful … Continue reading

Adults Can Improve the Way They Mentor Youth – And Make a Difference

Adults care a great deal about the youth in their communities. They want fewer kids to be at risk. They want more kids growing up to be strong, happy, successful adults. They’re willing to be mentors to young people. And … Continue reading

Kid Hacks His Education, Hacks His Life

You’ll want to watch this video all the way through. This 13-year-old boy is amazing. You’ll wonder how young Logan LaPlante could become so smart, so articulate, so mature, and so happy after only one year of adolescence! As you … Continue reading

Wisdom…

Forty years ago, I was in graduate school at Duke University, in over my head, learning as hard and fast as I could to catch up to my classmates. It paid off – I earned my Ph.D. four years later. … Continue reading

Parents – How and Why Teens Risk Their Futures and Their Lives

From Tina Marconi of BabySitters.net, we have this timely guest post that gives parents a heads-up about adolescent risk-taking and the horrendous consequences. Taking healthy risks is an essential aspect of childhood development, and is one of the best ways … Continue reading

Comedian Louis C.K. on Raising His Daughters

“I’m not raising kids. I’m raising the adults they’re going to turn into.” – Louis C.K. An empowering, realistic distinction! Instead of seeing their teenager as a kid who’s been in the family for more than a decade, parents need … Continue reading

10 Important Lessons Moms Can Teach Their Sons

A boy who grows up without the guidance of a father is at a disadvantage, even at risk. But the role of the mother, who more often than not is the primary nurturer, has an enormous influence. This guest post … Continue reading

Teens Rise [Fall?] to the Cinnamon Challenge – An Epidemic of Low Self-Esteem

“The Cinnamon Challenge.” Young teens dare each other to swallow a tablespoon of cinnamon in less than a minute without water. Many teens see it as a popular way to have a lot of fun. Part of the excitement is … Continue reading

1 Million Adolescent Suicide Attempts Per Year

Recently a huge tornado devastated a small town in Oklahoma, killing 24 people. Stories and images of the destruction were all over the Internet, the newspapers and television news. The coverage reminded me of when in early June, 1966, I … Continue reading

Teaching Kids about Identity Theft

Identity theft is a real problem and, sadly, children are not exempt from having their identities stolen. Recently, Nancy Parker of eNannySource.com connected with Julie Myhre, who covers identity theft for NextAdvisor.com. Nancy graciously shared the text of their conversation … Continue reading

Puberty – The Lost Passage from Child to Adult

The goal of parenting a teenager:  to help the child mature into a responsible, happy, successful adult. Even parents who consciously keep this goal in mind often have an awful time dealing with teen emotion, rebellion, risk-taking and substance abuse. … Continue reading

Are You a “Conscious Parent”?

In another post, I talked about a movie that portrayed a dysfunctional family that included two well-intended but – as I described them – “unconscious” parents. I put my own parents in that category. I knew that my mom and … Continue reading

Free Resources – Help Your Teen Wire a Smart Brain

Every time a teenager tries to figure out why something happened, tries to understand the relationship between thing A and thing B, tries to see the connection between cause and effect, foresees possible consequences, evaluates options, solves problems and consciously … Continue reading

5 Magic Questions – Help Your Teen Learn from Mistakes

Fact: To learn from what happens to you, you have to take the time to think about what happened, why it happened and what you could have done differently. And most people don’t always do that. Fact: Busy teenagers almost never … Continue reading

When Adolescents Get Drunk – Permanent Brain Damage

Drinking alcohol with the expressed purpose of getting wasted? Believe it or not, this is mostly an activity practiced by kids. Watch this brief video… What can a parent do? In a calm, non-threatening, supportive way, tell the child about … Continue reading

My Interview with Lon Woodbury of LA Talk Radio – What Parents Can Do to Help Wire Their Teen’s Brain for Critical Thinking

Lon Woodbury (LA Talk Radio) and I had a great discussion about the teen brain (to listen or download, scroll down to January 28, 2013). I talked about the big changes going on in the pre-frontal cortex (PFC), the last area of the … Continue reading

Parent-Child Communication – Build the Bridge, or Tear it Down

Teenagers…emotional, inarticulate and needy, may try to ask for something or make a statement. Maybe they want to buy something. Maybe they want to go somewhere. Maybe they’re having a problem. But parents are human, too, and not always in … Continue reading

Parenting Teens – 9 Great Quotes

In another post, I wrote about a terrific parenting book called CDO Chief Daddy Officer: The Business of Fatherhood, by Chris Efessiou. A highly successful business leader and father, he made a strong case that the fundamentals of effective leadership … Continue reading

For Parents of Teens: How to Change Your Child’s Behavior

Father: “Hey, son. I thought I asked you to clean and put away the tools after you use them.” Son: “Oh. Right.” Father: “Well, the tools you used last night are still on the bench. Why didn’t you put them … Continue reading

West Point Ingrained My Critical Thinking Skills

When I was in high school, I got an A in every subject I ever took. I didn’t find out until later that I hadn’t learned as much as I thought. But man, I knew how to make A’s! My … Continue reading

Chief Daddy Officer – Loving Father ‘Leads’ His Daughter

This is a unique book on parenting. Chris Efessiou, a highly successful entrepreneur and executive, believes that the personal strengths and interpersonal skills essential to effective leadership also apply to being an effective parent. I’ve always believed this, and in … Continue reading

Study: Using Marijuana Can Make Teens Stupid – Permanently

A new study has concluded that teenagers who smoke pot suffer a significant drop in IQ that persists even if they stop smoking it later in life. The article doesn’t explain why, except for this statement by lead researcher Madeline Meier … Continue reading

How Moms of Addicted Children Share and Get Support

The Addict’s Mom. It’s a blog. It’s a forum. It’s a chatroom. It’s a Facebook page. It’s resources and support. Thousands of parents who have addicted children have found help and a place where they can “share without shame.” The … Continue reading

When Your Child Is Bullied – What to Do

Bullying is a big problem for a lot of kids. It’s a problem because it happens so often, and an attack on a child, whether physical or psychological, can cause unfortunate consequences. The “if it doesn’t kill you it makes … Continue reading

The Teen Years – A Scary Time of Life

I often say that “the teen years are a perilous time of life,” meaning that bad things can and do happen. Sometimes really bad things. Like a teenager being killed. If you think this is an overstatement, consider the sad … Continue reading

Larry Winget – Your Kids Are Your Own Fault

Over the decades, a lot of bad advice for parents has been published. Strategies such as false praise, helicopter parenting and permissiveness may have played to parents’ fears of losing the love of their child, but the consequences have been … Continue reading

The 3 Most Powerful Ways to Give Your Teen An Edge in Life

It’s amazing what you see when you step outside the box. I’ve been focusing on the special challenge of raising teenagers for over a year now, and I’ve been outside the box the whole time. Inside the box, you understand … Continue reading

Will a Teen Decide Based on Reason, Habit, or Emotion?

I consider myself a serious thinker. But to be honest, I’m not an intellectual. I’m biased towards action. I have a Ph.D., but 95% of what I know today I learned on my own after earning that degree. So seemingly … Continue reading

Teen Suicide – What Can a Parent Do to Prevent It?

Johann Eyfells, portrait by Kristin Eyfells Not long ago I was sitting at a table drinking coffee and talking with Johann Eyfells, the world-famous Icelandic sculptor. At some point, I used the word “luck.” He quickly seized on the word. … Continue reading

Aha! Personal Development for Teenagers!

For over 30 years my work has been focused on adult personal development – personal strengths and people skills. My company, Performance Support Systems, has published some award-winning internationally recognized assessment and development systems, all brain and behavior-based. For nearly … Continue reading

The Story Behind the “Wise Uncle” and “Wise Aunt” Books

For quite a while now, I’ve felt that the kind of personal development that we encourage with adults should begin during the teen years, if not before – that in fact the adult learners we serve with programs like ProStar … Continue reading

Who I Write For – Parents Who Are Willing to Do the Work

At 6:30 AM every morning I leave my driveway and head for the gym. Most days, as I pass a certain intersection, I see a car with its headlights on, parked by the side of the road. It’s a parent … Continue reading

Reading Will Help Your Teen Develop a Fine Mind

I have a friend whose dad had a personal library of several thousand books. When my friend was about ten years old, his dad enrolled him in a speed-reading course. Soon afterward, he began reading the classics of world literature. … Continue reading

Sean Covey on Teen Peer Pressure

Teens are famous for doing wild and crazy things without thinking about the consequences. I shudder when I remember some my own antics as a teenager. Of course one of the reasons for this behavior is that they’re experimenting and … Continue reading

Teen Development – The All-Important Core Strengths

A successful, happy life. I guess everybody knows it takes more than than money and beauty. Just ask Bernie Madoff and Kim Kardashian. And guess what…It also takes a lot more than a good education and business know-how. I try … Continue reading

Sex Advice for Teen Girls – Establish Boundaries

The book, Conversations with the Wise Aunt, is in the final stages of preparation and will soon appear as a Kindle ebook. In the chapter, “A Nice Way to Say No,” Aunt Maria explains to her niece, Trisha, how boys … Continue reading

John Rosemond’s Book: Teen-Proofing

Some of the best authors on the subject of parenting have books about teens. Many of the more recent ones treat the topic of teen brain development. John Rosemond is my favorite authority on parenting who doesn’t talk about brain … Continue reading

The 5 Critical Communication Skills for Parents of Teens

There are five communication skills that are so important to parenting a teenager that the failure to use any one of them – even just once – can cause problems in a relationship. My research of the literature has taught … Continue reading

Jackson’s Story – Teen Rebellion Channeled into Positives

In this blog space, I’ve referred many times to something I call the “teen journey.” It’s the difficult, perilous 12-year developmental period called “adolescence” that has a profound, permanent impact on the rest of a person’s life. Every teen journey … Continue reading

I Recall My Own Teenage Years – Some Surprises

A few years ago, I had a reunion with some old high school buddies that I hadn’t seen in nearly 50 years. It was an amazing experience and a lot of fun. But I remember one comment my old friend … Continue reading

The Brain Talk – A Young Girl Learns What’s Happening in Her Teen Brain

I’m just guessing, but it may be true that no teenager in the long history of planet Earth has ever been given “the brain talk,” even though it’s probably the most important information a teen can have. Nevertheless, imagine a … Continue reading

What Sowing Wild Oats Is All About

A friend once told me a story about his older brother. My friend was a top student and multi-sport athlete in high school, and he eventually got a football scholarship and later had a successful career as an executive. His … Continue reading

Teens, Alcohol, and Brain Damage

This post is mainly for parents of kids aged 10-25. But if you’re a grandparent, a coach, a teacher, or involved in programs that help teens, you should read this, too. I’ve written several posts – mostly directed at parents … Continue reading

Dr. David Walsh’s “Why Do They Act That Way?” – 4 Basics for Parenting Teens

Do you have a teenager in your life? I ask this question a lot these days, because a lot of people are in this situation. And a young person’s developmental experience during the 12-15 year period called adolescence has become … Continue reading

Conversations with the Wise Aunt

Not many parents feel comfortable talking to their kids about sex and other momentous topics. There’s a lot of ground to cover, and parents know they’re not experts on every subject. Besides, times have changed, and they remember their own … Continue reading

Conversations with the Wise Uncle

Not many parents feel comfortable talking to their kids about sex and other momentous topics. There’s a lot of ground to cover, and parents know they’re not experts on every subject. Besides, times have changed, and they remember their own … Continue reading

What’s Happening in the Developing Teen Brain

In another post I described the phases of child brain growth. At each phase, different areas of the brain are developed. Two important things happen during each phase – blossoming and pruning. Dendrites are the tiny filaments on a brain … Continue reading