Tag Archives: relationships

The One thing All Players Need from Their Coach and Parents

Without adults, there would be no organized youth sports. But adults can ruin it for the kids. In this guest post, writer Quinn McDowell gives us adults some good advice. Managing the Complexity The dynamics between players, coaches, and parents … Continue reading

Teach Your Children Well

“Teach Your Children Well” (1969) written by Graham Nash, performed by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young I first heard this song in a bunker in Vietnam. It touched my heart before I understood the lyrics. I returned safe but with … Continue reading

Bonding with Teens – The Secret Sauce Is How You Talk to Them

Teens are different from younger kids in lots of ways. They may not be adults yet, but they aren’t little kids anymore. If you talk to them as if they are, you’ll push them away. They need your guidance, but … Continue reading

When a Son “Hates” His Mom

This guest article comes from Tim Wright, author of Searching for Tom Sawyer. In this personal story, he illustrates the shock and disorientation parents feel when they aren’t conscious that their child has reached puberty and has begun the second … Continue reading

Effective Communication Skills – The Game-Changer for Parents of Teenagers

Teenagers know they’re growing up, and they don’t like being treated like little kids. They need the wisdom and guidance of parents and other adults. But they hate lectures, sarcasm, put-downs, screaming, commands, threats, ultimatums, shaming, judging, and blaming. Don’t … Continue reading

The Miracle Skill of Parent-Child Communication

My dad wasn’t a good listener, and my mom wasn’t much better. But I have no bad feelings about this. It was just an aspect of how things were back then. In 1960, only a few people on the planet … Continue reading

Bye-Bye Dirty Dozen, Hello 7 Key Parent-Child Communication Skills

For me, the best book ever written about parent-child communication was Dr. Thomas Gordon’s P.E.T. – Parent Effectiveness Training, a 1975 classic that is still widely used today. It isn’t easy to raise kids. Sometimes they’re sweet and adorable. But … Continue reading

Recipe for Disappointment – Making Assumptions about Your Teen

The dad lets his son borrow the car. “Be sure to have it back by six. I’ve got an important place to be tonight.” “No problem, Dad.” Six o’clock comes and goes. With no sign of his son, he makes … Continue reading

Grant Hill Mentors Young Duke Basketball Players – It Takes a Village

This video shows basketball legend Grant Hill sitting down with young players of the 2013-2014 Duke basketball team and talking to them not about basketball, but about LIFE.   Powerful. I’m sure every parent would love to have an adult … Continue reading

Feedback Done Right – Motivating Kids to Do What You Want

Compliments. Praise. Recognition. Affirmation. Gratitude. Appreciation. Positive feedback. Positive strokes. Pats on the back. Good stuff! Unfortunately, most of the feedback we give our kids is negative. You know – CRITICISM. When we’re bothered by something they’ve done and we … Continue reading

About Sunny – Is a Single Mother’s Love Enough?

I recently streamed the movie, About Sunny, starring Lauren Ambrose, an accomplished but relatively unknown young actress. Whenever a movie is excellent in every way and I want Netflix to give me more suggestions like it, I always rate it … Continue reading

7 Practical Ideas for Nurturing the Parent-Teen Bond

Thanks to Maureen Denard at FindaNanny.net for this guest post. The adolescent years can stress a parent-child relationship. This article has several practical ideas for helping the bond to grow stronger. In a world where there never seems to be … Continue reading

The Generation Gap – A Failure of Parent-Teen Communication

A teenager made a dumb mistake and damaged a tool. His father, angry, shouted at him about carelessness and irresponsibility. No love, understanding or respect was communicated in the heated interchange. The boy felt like a failure and resented his … Continue reading

10 Important Lessons Moms Can Teach Their Sons

A boy who grows up without the guidance of a father is at a disadvantage, even at risk. But the role of the mother, who more often than not is the primary nurturer, has an enormous influence. This guest post … Continue reading

Puberty – The Lost Passage from Child to Adult

The goal of parenting a teenager:  to help the child mature into a responsible, happy, successful adult. Even parents who consciously keep this goal in mind often have an awful time dealing with teen emotion, rebellion, risk-taking and substance abuse. … Continue reading

The Kids in Your Life Need You to Be Strong

Are you a parent or grandparent? Then you have first-hand experience with the uncountable problems, issues, mistakes and failures that are always a part of helping a young person grow up to be a happy, successful adult. It’s truly wonderful … Continue reading

Are You a “Conscious Parent”?

In another post, I talked about a movie that portrayed a dysfunctional family that included two well-intended but – as I described them – “unconscious” parents. I put my own parents in that category. I knew that my mom and … Continue reading

Many Parents Avoid Frank Talks with Their Teens – For Good Reasons

I’ve written two books, Conversations with the Wise Uncle (for boys) and Conversations with the Wise Aunt (for girls). Both are fictional accounts about an older relative mentoring a young person during the teen years to give the child a “heads up” … Continue reading

Parent-Child Communication – Build the Bridge, or Tear it Down

Teenagers…emotional, inarticulate and needy, may try to ask for something or make a statement. Maybe they want to buy something. Maybe they want to go somewhere. Maybe they’re having a problem. But parents are human, too, and not always in … Continue reading

Grow the Bond with Your Child – Forgive the Small Things

As we prepared to go the gym for our morning workout, my wife discovered that she had misplaced her car keys. We searched for ten minutes and finally found them in the car, still in the ignition. Unfortunately, the battery … Continue reading

Straight Talk for Teens – Young People Sharing Perspectives

One of the perplexing things about teenagers is that they tend to trust the input of their peers more than the advice of their own parents – perhaps because they feel their friends understand their situation better. Understanding this dynamic … Continue reading

Low Self-Esteem – One of the Perils of Being a Teenager

It’s unfortunate that so many teenagers feel miserable… Maybe they can’t afford the clothes the cool kids wear – I WON’T BE POPULAR. Maybe they lag behind in reading and basic learning skills – I’M NOT SMART. Maybe they were … Continue reading

When Your Child Is Bullied – What to Do

Bullying is a big problem for a lot of kids. It’s a problem because it happens so often, and an attack on a child, whether physical or psychological, can cause unfortunate consequences. The “if it doesn’t kill you it makes … Continue reading

Good Parents, Great Parents

I’m sure many parents of teens dream of someday saying about their grown child: “He’s doing so well. He’s a really, really smart guy.” (Or gal…) And they hope their grown child says about them, “I had such great parents. … Continue reading

The Story Behind the “Wise Uncle” and “Wise Aunt” Books

For quite a while now, I’ve felt that the kind of personal development that we encourage with adults should begin during the teen years, if not before – that in fact the adult learners we serve with programs like ProStar … Continue reading

The 5 Critical Communication Skills for Parents of Teens

There are five communication skills that are so important to parenting a teenager that the failure to use any one of them – even just once – can cause problems in a relationship. My research of the literature has taught … Continue reading